A casual relationship: no strings attached?Category: Social Issues
Article added by: Fran Rimrod
Happy on my own – is what many Australians live and celebrate in the millennium. A 2002 report from the Australian Bureau auf Statistics shows less people getting married and the divorce rate is steadily creeping up.
More and more people do not seek happiness and fulfillment in a monogamous long term relationship, but are happy to engage in a ‘casual’ relationship.
With the internet and the recent boom of adult dating sites the ordeal of finding a match for a casual relationship has become much easier and less stigmatised.
Dr Gabrielle Morrissey, sexologist and author, says when engaging in a casual relationship it is important to qualify in detail what the criteria for the encounter are.
"Many people who are involved casually make the mistake of not distinguishing between whether they are having casual sex or a casual relationship — the two are quite different!”
This differentiation becomes important when people actively seeking other likeminded people, submit their profiles on adult dating services or internet sites.
"Casual sex refers to engaging in the physical act of sex, plain and simple —a bonking buddy, with the emphasis on the bonking rather than the buddy.”
Normally the involvement with each other does not extend over exchanging phone numbers or email addresses after a first online meeting on an adult dating site, so meetings for regular sex can be arranged. Most members on adult dating sites looking for this kind of encounter seek discretion, which means no dates, no social outings, no meeting the family, no breakfasts out at cafes, no talk of the future, basically no relating outside a sexual realm.
Other members of adult dating sites such as the successful Australian matchmaker www.adultsonly.com.au seek a casual relationship, which can be different to casual sex only.
"The casual relationship involves sex — often first and foremost, because it's the glue keeping the relationship together, but there is more to the bonding than only the sex, says Morrisey.
"The real trickiness of the casual relationship revolves around the rules. When one is social with a casual partner, the question of monogamy is raised.”
Quite regularly though one of the involved will try to blur the boundaries previously set.
Morrissey says once a relationship has been defined as casual, the chances of transferring it to a monogamous relationship are low.
"Can you transform a casual sex situation or a casual relationship into something more? Sometimes. More often not. But it's worth a try and you're more likely to have half a chance of success only if you admit up front you're changing the rules.
It is important that people on adult dating site are absolutely certain what they are after and make sure possible matches know those rules of engagement.
http://www.adultsonly.com.au
Posted By: Fran Rimrod
Web: http://www.adultsonly.com.au
Contact: e-mail
| About the Author: |
| Fran Rimrod is and Online Content Manager. Her current project is the free Australian Dating Website Adultsonly– http://www.adultsonly.com.au |
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